“We have a 5-day old baby boy; would you like him?”
By an Anonymous St. Max Family
Each day in our house, we are thankful for two courageous women who chose life.
In 1966, Sean’s* birth mother found herself single and pregnant. His birth father was unsupportive yet she made the brave decision to bring him into the world. Her choice gave us the gift of Sean’s life.
Sean spent the first part of his life in foster care before being adopted. So, when it came time to grow our family, we always knew adoption through foster care would be part of our path. After having two biological children, Joy* in 2001 and Nathan* in 2003, we felt ready in 2010 to welcome a new addition. Our journey began with training, background checks, and home visits, and finally, on November 29, 2011, we were licensed foster parents.
Little did we know, about 10 miles down the road, there was a baby waiting for us.
On November 30, Sean had started a new job and Kaitlyn* was at home when the call came. “We have a 5-day old baby boy, would you like him?” It was surreal, but the answer was an instant, heartfelt yes. Just a few hours later, Joshua* arrived on our doorstep, weighing only five pounds—no bigger than a football.
When Joy and Nathan came home from school, they were surprised beyond words. They knew we could welcome a baby at any time, but no one expected it to happen so soon. Joy squealed with excitement, while Nathan, wanting a football-playing brother, hesitated—Joshua was the size of a football, after all!
The first few months were both exhilarating in having a baby in the home but also concerning as we began to care for him. He was so tiny! At first, we had to feed him with a medicine dropper. The greatest worry, however, came from the unknowns about his background and future.
We eventually learned more about his birth mother. A single woman, unemployed, living in a home without running water or electricity, she made the loving decision to bring Joshua into the world. He was born at home, breech, with the cord wrapped around his neck, and no prenatal care. Thankfully, she called the EMTs, who took them to the hospital. They alerted Children Services, and when she tested positive for drugs, Joshua was placed in the system.
Our hearts were heavy with worry. The lack of prenatal care, drug exposure, the difficult birth—would Joshua be okay?
We would be lying to say it was not a difficult and long journey. The most difficult part was knowing that he could be taken from us at any moment. We had periodic court hearings, in which we knew he might not be coming home with us. It was a nerve-racking time for our family. In the midst of this whirlwind, we also didn’t realize the impact this uncertainty had on our extended family. There was a lot of time spent in prayer and enduring the struggle of trusting in God’s plan.
Finally, on the morning of November 22, 2014, just before his 3rd birthday, our entire extended family joined us at the Butler County Courthouse courtroom. He asked us a few questions. He then asked Joshua if he wanted us to adopt him. He called Joshua up to his bench and gave him the gavel. With Joshua’s resounding bang of the gavel, the judge proclaimed Joshua to be our son. It was a moment we will never forget.
A month later, we were finally able to celebrate his baptism.
Perhaps you’ve seen Joshua around St. Max. He is an altar server and sings in the Children’s Choir. At the parish festival, he insists on working one of the children’s games and ends up running the game for the two-hour shift, pushing us adults off to the side. You will see him often up at Church during the week as he is always asking to be run up to Church so he can “pray with Jesus” a bit. There is a joy that radiates through him. His eyes have a light in them that truly is the Light of Christ.
As a foster child comes into your home, it is natural to think you will guard your heart. Children Services even warns you about becoming attached. But that instinct was quickly forgotten as each of us picked Joshua up and held him. He was instantly our son; a gift God quite literally delivered to our doorstep.
This journey has been about love—God’s love for us, our love for Joshua, and Joshua’s love for God. In the confusion and cold uncertainty of the foster care system, love was our anchor. And now, what shines brightest is Joshua’s deep love for Jesus. He knows that Jesus loves him, and that truth fills him with joy.
People often tell us that we’ve been a blessing to Joshua; but the truth is, he has been the blessing to us. We cannot imagine our lives without him. He is our beloved son.
Only after becoming foster parents did we truly understand the meaning of Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
*The names in this testimony have been changed to protect the identities of these parishioners.